SATIRE: One More Time Before It’s Illegal

Photo via Ohio Senate

Michael Oliss | News Editor

Ohio Senate Bill 87 seems like a no-brainer at first glance. The bill’s stated purpose is to “define antisemitism” and “expand the offense of ethnic intimidation.”

You may think it reinforces significant American values like equality, justice, and pretending everyone has freedom of speech, but underneath the flowery legal language of SB 87 lurks a hidden truth: this bill is trying to protect Israel’s feelings.

“Drawing comparisons of contemporary Israeli policy to that of the Nazi regime” is listed in the bill as an example of antisemitism. This is unfortunate because it is incredibly easy to draw comparisons of contemporary Israeli policy to that of Nazi Germany.

This isn’t about proving Israel is Nazi Germany. It’s about questioning why drawing historical comparisons — something we do constantly in every other subject — is suddenly punishable, stigmatized, or even career-ending. With that in mind, let’s draw comparisons of Israeli policy and Nazi Germany one last time before it’s illegal.

Collective Punishment
Nazis infamously killed scores of uninvolved people after small pockets of resistance were found in their occupied territories. The Third Reich’s whole thing was murdering innocent people. Hitler’s response to the death of one of his own would be to kill 5,000.

In response to Hamas’ Oct. 7, 2023, attacks, the Israeli Defense Forces have fired missiles at schools, hospitals, and refugee centers. Around 1,500 Israelis have been killed, while over 70,000 Palestinians have died, with millions displaced. Israel has been accused of using killing methods that are purposely indiscriminate to inflict maximum civilian casualties and harm. Critics say bombing hospitals is bad. Israel has a more nuanced view.

Genocidal Rhetoric
In the early stages of the Holocaust, Nazi propaganda relied heavily on dehumanizing language, referring to Jewish people as animals or vermin to justify escalating violence.

Despite what Ohio lawmakers want you to think, the rhetoric used by Israeli officials about Palestinians echoes the dehumanizing language used by the Nazi regime against Jewish people. Different Israeli politicians have called to “flatten Gaza” and to “wipe it off the map.” Their feelings are not unique in the Israeli government.

On Oct. 9, 2023, Defense Minister Yoav Gallant said, “We are fighting human animals, and we are acting accordingly.” When a population is framed as less than human, it becomes easier to justify increasingly severe and eventually genocidal actions against them. The IDF has a history of calling Palestinians cockroaches, and has more influence in Israel now than ever.

Legal Racism
Nazis studied racial segregation laws in the American South (don’t worry about it) and drew on them when creating the Nuremberg Laws—laws that stripped Jewish people of citizenship and codified their status as de facto second-class citizens.

Israel has a different set of laws for its minority race, too. In places like the West Bank, Israeli settlers are governed by ordinary civilian law; Palestinians are subject to military law. Israel presents the legal segregation — which the UN says “violates international law” — as a security measure, not a legal framework for genocide.

It would be wrong to insinuate that a nation founded by Holocaust refugees is now, in a modernized form, using systems similar to those that once oppressed them to pursue a genocide of its own. But if SB 87 passes, comparing the historical patterns of the two apartheid states would be considered legally equivalent to spraypainting a swastika or yelling a racial slur.

This bill is doing the very thing Ohio lawmakers are scared of most: dressing itself as something it’s not. It appears as a noncontroversial piece of legislation. In reality, SB 87 would restrict people’s First Amendment right to make ironic historical comparisons.

*This is a satirical article. It does not reflect the views of anyone at UD or Flyer News.*