By: Katy Hoeper – Staff Writer
Flyer News: So how did all of you meet?
Matt Chkautovich: Aw, that’s a good question! I met Andrew freshman year, and he hated me.
Andrew Brackmann: Well, he wore tanks so…
Ryan Shirk: And Brack and I went to school together in Cincinnati.
Ben Vickers: We all met at Beach Day in Marycrest freshman year! And Matt and I are friends, mostly because I’ve been trying to be friends with frat stars my whole life.
FN: Frat star, huh?
MC: Yeah, well, one time I wore a vest out on a Saturday, and from then on I’ve been a frat star.
BV: Dude, last time I wore a vest, I was four.
FN: Do you have any house traditions?
BV: Every time we go out for the night, we play “Graduation” by Vitamin C.
MC: Basically so we’ll be numb to it by the end of the year.
BV: We also host the annual University of Dayton Fall Fest.
RS: Just for us four.
AB: Only roommates are allowed. Lots of cured meat.
BV: It’s great, we carve out a pumpkin for pumpkin cake, then pour drinks in there like a serving bowl.
FN: If you were visiting for your 10-year reunion, what would everyone be up to?
RS: Brackmann is going to be a correspondent on CNBC.
BV: Shirk would be the one in the trench coat on the bike path.
MC: I think Ben would be juggling a few kids around. He’s very fertile.
BV: Wow that’s … bizarre …
MC: I’m going to be cutting coupons.
AB: No way dude, you’re going to be going through your third midlife crisis by then, let’s be real.
FN: What would you say the theme song of 232 K Street is?
ALL: “Shake It Off” by Taylor Swift, for sure.
FN: If you knew you could stay at a certain age forever, what would it be and why?
RS: I’m going to say nine, because I want to be a kid forever.
BV: Okay, Peter Pan…
AB: For me, probably 22, because T. Swift sings about it…
MC: I want to be 21, so I can be a degenerate forever.
AB: Or maybe 18, so I can buy some smokes.
BV: I want to be 100, so I can be on the Smucker’s jar every year.
FN: Give everyone in your house a superlative.
BV: Let’s start with Matt: “Most Likely to Skype His Family.” Matt Skypes his family multiple times a day. Morning, day, night, doesn’t matter.
RS: And he loves talking about it …
MC: Shirk is “Most Likely to Offend You!”
AB: No, Shirk is “Most Likely to be on the Bike Path.”
RS: Ben is “Most Likely to Live Life Aggressively.”
RS: And Andrew is “Most Likely to Wake You Up at 7 a.m.”
BV: On a weekend …
AB: Ben is “Most Likely to Burn Your Nostrils.”
FN: Most likely to what … ?
BV: OK, wait, let me explain. The chicken was really spicy, so the air was really pungent, OK?
FN: What’s your #1 house rule?
BV: Wait, we totally prepared for this one.
AB: Always wave!
RS: Ben gets two beer showers per semester. No exceptions.
BV: Now that you mention it, I haven’t cashed one in a while….
MC: Well I don’t follow the house rules, because I’m a rebel.
BV: No, it’s because he’s in a frat.
FN: Being seniors, what advice do you guys want to give the underclassmen?
AB: Meet Bob Dean. He’s like 82 and awesome.
MC: I don’t understand the question because there’s no way I’m a senior yet …
BV: Live life aggressively.
RS: Go to the Marycrest Beach Day and ignore that one dumb Tom Petty quote, because he never went to college!
AB: Oh! Go to China. Apparently, it’s the same cost as a semester here.
MC: Hang out with me…please?
All: Oh, and definitely go to Bourbon Street Grill.
FN: What is the perfect method for eating an Oreo?
RS: I had an Oreo in psychology class yesterday.
AB: Not the bike path, Shirk?
BV: Here’s the perfect method: I twist it in half, break the side without the filling in half, proceed to scrape the filling off, eat it and throw away the now fillingless side.
FN: Finally, what’s your favorite spot at UD?
MC: Andrew’s favorite spot is the Crying Circle. You know, the little half-circle area with stairs between KU and Miriam hall? You can only sit there if you’re sad.
BV: Yeah, he’s quite an emotional dude.
AB: Shirk’s is that little designated smoking area right outside the Rike Center.
BV: Oh man, Bdubs. I love me some Buffalo Wild Wings.
AB: He’s also all about Stu’s Landing.
RS: And Matt here loves historic campus.
FN: What’s historic campus?
ALL: Wouldn’t you like to know.