Armed with a can of bug spray, a gallon of bleach, a towel and various toiletries, I am fully prepared to face 'The Shower.' One has to admit that sharing a bathroom with 40 other girls can be a little gross.

Compiled from a lunch table discussion amongst my friends about their experiences in The Shower, I present to you the 'Shower Chronicles.'

One friend reports that he always turns on the hot water full force and 'sanitizes' the stall before entering. His theory is that the high temperature will annihilate any germs that may be growing on the floor'and just about everywhere else. I'm not quite sure why he feels the need to purify the floor considering he's wearing shoes (I hope), but I don't question this guy's paranoia. Better safe than sorry, I suppose.

Then there's the millisecond rule. If one of my comrades experiences the misfortune of dropping her razor blade while shaving in The Shower, she has decided that it can only remain on the floor for a millisecond before it becomes contaminated and unusable. In fact, anything touching the floor or walls is automatically tossed in the trashcan.

Speaking of touching the walls, no body part is permitted to touch the tiles. There can be any number of little bacteria multiplying on the walls, just waiting to jump on a victim's skin and infect her. To guard against this, the standard position while showering is a huddle in the exact center of the enclosure. One's appendages are permitted to move in an area just wide enough to clean necessary parts of the body.

It wouldn't surprise me if my companions went so far as to do the proper calculations to ensure they were situated in the exact middle.

One shower stall on my floor has been dubbed 'The Cave.' The Cave is located about as far away from a light source as, well, a cave. Needless to say, it is quite dark. I keep expecting to find eyeless critters lurking in there amongst the tiles and showerhead. One practically has to feel her way around for lack of light. Of course, this poses a major problem because that entails touching the dreaded walls. Then again, there is probably no cleaner shower as a result of its infrequent use'not too many people favor showering blindly.

And finally, there are our friends, the bugs. I suppose insects enjoy being clean as much as humans do. Or, perhaps they just enjoy seeing naked co-eds run out of The Shower screaming. Despite Housekeeping's best efforts, cockroaches and spiders frequent the stalls, scaring the daylights out of the unfortunate soul who happens to be in The Shower at the time. I recall an instance towards the beginning of the year when a male was recruited to evict the offending insect.

Ah, the adventures of The Shower. It makes me appreciate home where I don't have to wear shoes to bathe and I can lie in the tub without fear of contracting some nasty fungus. And most welcome of all'no bugs.