A good friend of mine once tweeted, “Words are hard.”
Well, I say relationships are hard, especially long-distance ones. I have come to this conclusion through countless long-distance relationships that I have observed through close family members, cherished friends and even fictional characters from books and television. College freshmen, and college students in general, often struggle to maintain their sweethearts during this ever-changing time in their lives.
How do you remain in a committed relationship when you are separated from your significant other? How can you be sure one of you will not change or outgrow the relationship? Will the interactions with others stir up new emotions about your current relationship? Are you missing opportunities to meet new, enticing people? Can one ever be sure that you trust your mate? Does distance apart really make the heart grow fonder? Why can “so and so” keep a long distance relationship and I can’t? These questions and many more tumble around the heads of lovers.
I am a romantic who dreams of courtship, chivalry and soul mates. I believe in the power of love and commitment. However, I also strongly consider the role communication plays into the relationship. Of course, you need attraction and fireworks, but you also need the ability to communicate with your other half as well. Without communication, you would never understand how the other person is feeling, therefore directing the relationship onto rocky roads.
It is extremely hard for either gender to communicate their feelings effectively and fully. In my experience, as a woman, I can translate a simple “yes” or “no” into something substantial. In turn, I feel ignored and become outraged. I can twist a tiny situation into colossal wreckage or, as some would say, “make a mountain out of a molehill.” I tend to analyze every word said by a boyfriend and create unneeded drama. This has been my downfall of my own long-distance relationships.
For women, talking is how we express our feelings and connect to others, whereas men speak through actions, not words, and only talk to achieve a goal or solve a problem. There is no right or wrong way to communicate as long as there is respect for other people’s opinions. Communication allows a relationship to blossom and to reach new heights of love that encompass respect and friendship.
Imagine a relationship where happiness is constant, one that you know your significant other is committed to you no matter the distance. It is possible. It will not be easy, but nothing in life that is worthwhile is easy.
Think about the organic chemistry class that you have to take for your pre-med major so you can become the doctor, the person you always dreamed of being, or training for a 5K run for a charity event. My take on long-distance relationships is that if you put the hard work in, you will gain something truly amazing that is irreplaceable.